Respect

This morning, I started my day in a sour mood because my dad and I had a heated argument with my Mom.  She's complaining about wanting to give Yangyang away because he keep peeing in its cage.
My Mom is quite hard to please when it comes to housework and is definitely the kind that will clean the whole kitchen, scrub the tiles if a small area is dirty so she washes the whole cage, bath the dogs and starts nagging that nobody can help her. My sister and I would if we are able to but she was out and I'm not in the right condition to help.

After that she complained about her body being weak, aching all over. We suggest that she go for light exercise and stretching. It would help but she yelled at us for forcing her to exercise and she can't, it will worsen her condition because she is born to not be able to exercise(she insist having a weak heart but no, she is not suffering from any heart disease). WHICH ABLED BODY ARE BORN NOT ABLE TO MOVE? This is ridiculous.

We have to rush for breakfast because she needs to take my Grandma to the hospital, a routine she goes through twice every month no matter how tired or busy she is.

Now, this is the main point of the post I would like to write down.

My mom do not have to work because my dad is making more than enough, he also give my grandparents allowance monthly. However for the past few years, it seems that my maternal grandma is becoming extremely dependable on my Mom due to her deteriorating health, financially my uncles are not giving support so it become the sole responsibility of my parents. My grandma have 4 children but one is not around anymore. The relationship there feels segregated. The rest don't visit often, they visit when they need help. One of my uncle works overseas, he hardly calls back and nobody is able to contact him. He don't send money back and let's not even say about taking care of his parents. The other is equally bad, he dont even visit often.

My grandma would sometimes call in the middle of the night to tell us that she is not feeling well and wants to go to the hospital, she don't call the rest. In the past, all benefits would mostly goes to the sons but now nobody is willing to take care of her. I'm not shrinking from this responsibility but shldn't all the children do their best to take care of their aging parents. It's only fair because with help from them, my parents will not feel a burden at all. This is stressing my own family because my Dad sometimes makes comment about his mother in law and it upsets my mother. On the other hand, he is stress about my grandma medical needs, the wages for the maid and having to visit her during midnight as a result my mom went to work part time to ease the burden. My family is not given any choice because the others simply don't bother at all. It is causing arguments no matter how, I don't like it when things like this affects my family. I dont mind if it doesn't caused any problem.

Born in a traditional family, I'm taught to respect my elderly and we shouldn't question about decision adults make because it is rude and wrong. However, I have my own idea of respect since I was little that it should be earned like how my parents wants me to earn what I want by myself. I don't understand why my mother kept quiet when my fat annoying aunt constantly pick on her and make me keep quiet when she make nasty comments about me, she insist I respect her. By default, I will give all elderly basic respect but when things are given without being earn, people like the fat annoying women takes it for granted and continue her bullying. I doubt they deserve the respect an adult should have.

It is the constant hurting, disappointing and irresponsibility that caused respect to be lost, I don't really know how to face them anymore when I meet them. This ideology of respecting elderly have caused me much problem during my childhood because I'm constantly fighting for myself without help from my mother when FAT BITCH ATTACKS, CANED BY MY UNCLES FOR SHIT MY COUSINS DO (without finding out the truth), GRANDMA DISLIKING ME BECAUSE SHE LISTEN HER FAVORITE EVIL FAT BITCH SAYING IM THE RUDEST KID IN THE WORLD EVERY TIME I REBUT AFTER SHE MAKES NASTY REMARK ON ME. I'm labeled rebellious.

I'm definitely not enlighten be that respect when people don't deserve it. I'm pretty sure that everyone will be free to collect the inheritance and they think they deserve a fair share.
Are these people the kind that deserve respect, by default?